Give In
by socgrl
Summary: Post Seasone 9 Finale Hail and Farewell
1. Give In

**Title:** Give In  
  
**Author:** socgrl  
  
**Rating:** PG  
  
**Spoilers**: Everything, especially "Hail and Farewell"  
  
**Disclaimer:** You know who owns them, and it certainly isn't me and the song is written and sung by Sara Evans.  
  
**A/N:** I have a habit of reading far too much into the minute things in the story line, that's why I've written pretty much the last 2 minutes of the finale into this fic. Bare with it, the song I felt was fitting so................Oh and though I've taken anatomy in-depth, I'm not about to pretend to know what is going on with Mac's medical issue. Many other writers have done that and have been very successful, I however would not be, lol, so please R & R and I hope you enjoy.

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**Officers Club  
  
Naval Academy  
  
Annapolis, MD**They exit the party arm and arm. The soft music filters outside to mix with the warmth of the evening air. The lights glisten from off of the trees, but there is a solemn feel surrounding them.  
  
"Are you ok?" he questions honestly.  
  
"You keep asking me that," she replies, sitting down on the bench outside.  
  
"Well, give me an answer that works," he rebuts.  
  
"I don't think I'm in a position to judge anything right now," she answers, defunct.  
  
With a slight pause and a bitter taste in his mouth he states, "You're missing him."  
  
She takes a moment to contemplate his remark, "We were getting close to something." She stares off into the distance trying to make herself believe that her words are true.  
  
"He lied to you Mac," he replies.  
  
"Maybe for the right reason," she rationalizes his words.  
  
"Is there one."  
  
"No," she states matter-of-factly, "Not in a relationship."  
  
"Did you love him?"  
  
"I told him I did," for a moment her mind drifts back to years ago in the alley where Dalton was killed. She had a sinking feeling that sobered her immediately. "I don't know if we had a future together, we hardly ever talked about it. We certainly never talked about kids."  
  
She looked up to see that he was contemplating his next words. She searched his face for any semblance of a hint but found only a glimmer of amusement.  
  
"I don't know if you realize it but this week is an anniversary of sorts," he states with confidence and a light smile.  
  
She looks to him for more information, confusion written on her face.  
  
"Five years ago," was all he said as the 'deal' registered in her head.  
  
"Are we already there?" she questions as though it's just one more thing to digest. "I knew it was this year but,"  
  
The look in his eyes is tender, loving, and understanding, "I know this isn't really the right time to talk about this but I want you to know that if you want to have a baby, in the future, the offer still holds."  
  
Her eyes glisten over as she searches his face for the words he's trying to find. "We could do it together, like we planned," he says with a smile. "That's all I had to say you don't have to," he stops noticing her diverted, watery eyes and the fact that she is holding her breath.  
  
"I'm sorry," he says trying to gauge her reaction. "I shouldn't have brought it up  
  
She breaths a heavy sigh and tries to search for the right thing to say, "You know, men just seam to pass through my life, except for you." Tentatively she asks, "Will you always be there?"  
  
"Yes," he hopes that that one word can encompass all that he is feeling. The support and love that he promises to provide.  
  
_When I look at you  
I see the souls of our unborn children  
If I reach for you  
Will you take my hand?  
Are you willing?  
You turn more then the music on  
But will you be there by my side at the dawn_Then the other shoe drops, "Then you need to know what the doctor told me," she says looking to him for strength.  
  
With silent support he reaches for her hand and laces her fingers with his. She searches for the nerve to tell him what she has yet to rationalize herself, that she may be unable to carry a child.  
  
The words to him are a blur. His mind registers the information and his heart stops for what feels like eternity. The woman he loves most in the world may not be able to fulfill her dream, the dream she so rightly deserves.  
  
"Mac, Sarah, I'm so sorry," he says, his eyes pleading with her to understand that he is not pitying her for another loss, but truly shares her pain.  
  
"Well it's not life threatening, and there is still a possibility, but they will have to operate and extract the affected tissue. Hormone therapy could be enough to strengthen my system, but we will not know until that time comes," she said trying to sound positive.  
  
"I meant what I said, I will be here for you no matter what; doctors visits, backrubs, what ever you need, I'm here, even if it's just to hold your hand. I'm not going anywhere and neither are you. You made a promise to me and I expect you keep it." he said bringing his free hand to caress her cheek.  
  
She leaned into his touch, her eyes spoke volumes,  
  
'What I want most Mac, is to never loose you.'  
  
'I promise, no matter what happens you won't loose me!'  
  
"I know, we don't make promises we can't keep, remember," was all she could say._If I sing for you,  
Would it be the sweetest sound you've ever heard?  
And I if I pray for you,  
Will you know that I believe every word?  
You build me a house on stone  
Will you promise me I'm never gonna be alone?_   
  
"Let's get you home and into some PJs. Then I'll make you some tea and get you set up with a heating pad for your back," he said standing up and pulling her along gingerly.  
  
"That sounds wonderful," she said finally letting her smile reach her eyes._All right, I give in  
I will dance with you just this one time  
And all night  
We will turn and spin  
Then stand eye to eye at the sunrise  
And you offer love  
And it all begins when I say  
All right, I give in_

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**A/N:** Chapter 2??? Let me know R&R please.


	2. Alright

**Title:** Alright  
  
**Author:** socgrl  
  
**Rating:** PG  
  
**Spoilers:** Everything, especially "Hail and Farewell"  
  
**Disclaimer:** You know who owns them, and it certainly isn't me

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**Last time on Give In:**  
  
"Let's get you home and into some PJs. Then I'll make you some tea and get you set up with a heating pad for your back," he said standing up and pulling her along gingerly.  
  
"That sounds wonderful," she said finally letting a smile reach her eyes.

* * *

**0330 Zulu**

**Mac's Apartment**

**Georgetown**

They entered Mac's apartment, Harm guiding her ever so slightly with a hand at the small of her back.  
  
"Why don't you head into your bedroom and put on some PJs and I'll go put the tea on," Harm suggested.  
  
Mac nodded with an appreciative smile and walked down the hallway towards her room. Moments later she walked back into the living room wearing her favorite navy blue silk PJs and found a comfortable spot on the couch.  
  
"I made a cup of green tea with honey and a cup of Chamomile tea. Which would you prefer?" Harm asked placing the two mugs down on the coffee table.  
  
"Thank you Harm. This is very sweet of you. I'll take the Chamomile, it may help me sleep." She shifted her wait on the couch and grimaced at the mild shooting pain that ran down her spine.  
  
Immediately Harm was at her side. "Mac, are you alright?" he asked, concern written all over his face.  
  
"Yeah, my back's sore" she said, "Calm down flyboy. It'll be alright," she smiled, trying to lighting the mood.  
  
"Would you like a massage?" he asked, "I've been told I have the magic touch, in fact I recall you moaning 'don't stop!' before," he said with a mischievous grin.  
  
"Harm, you've been too good to me already. I don't want to impose on your goodwill" she said still smiling. "Besides, are you sure that my moaning wasn't some fantasy your subconscious dreamed up," she returned his wicked smile.  
  
"Why don't we find out beautiful, roll over," he told Mac. She looked into his eyes and saw that he was not going to back away. He really was there to stay, through everything. Momentarily she thought of the night when Clay tried to give her a backrub and she refused. She couldn't bring herself to fully trust him. She couldn't allow herself to be that vulnerable around him. But she trusted Harm with her life and more and more she was again trusting him with her heart. Without questioning him again she pulled the three back pillows off of the sofa and tossed them over the side.  
  
"I have some Bengay™ in the medicine cabinet, would you mind rubbing it into my lower back and between my shoulder blades? I'm going to try and get more comfortable," she asked with thanks shining in her eyes.  
  
"I'd be happy to," said Harm as he made his way into her bedroom. "Hey...you don't still have my Academy sweats do you?" he yelled toward the living room.  
  
"Yeah, they are at the bottom of my PJ drawer. Bottom right corner," Mac yelled back. She was attempting to make herself comfortable on the couch. She grabbed a blanket out of the armoire, laid it down on the couch, took off the top to her PJs and placed herself on top of the blanket, stretching her arms above her head.  
  
Harm rooted through Mac's PJ drawer to the bottom and found what he was looking for. His sweatpants were under a number of silk nighties and teddies; he groaned inwardly but suppressed those thoughts for a later time. 'She can take advantage of me, but I will not take advantage of her.' He was deadly serious about not screwing this chance with her.  
  
After a couple of minutes Mac heard the door to her bathroom open. "Sheesh flyboy. What the hell took you so long? Man the navy really needs to work on time management. Did you find something appealing?" she said raising her eyes to watch him saunter into the living room.  
  
Mac had to suppress a groan of her own when she saw him walk in wearing his navy blue sweat pants with USNA going down the leg in yellow print. The white t-shirt he had worn under his dress whites fit him like a second skin. She could feel tightness in her stomach and it wasn't cramping from her procedure.  
  
"Wouldn't you like to know," he said suggestively. Then he saw her. She was laying face down on her couch. She was looking up at him with her cheek resting on folded hands. And she was topless.  
  
Mac saw him stall a little. "Harm, if this makes you uncomfortable in any way you don't have to. I can get my lower back," she said giving him opportunity to back down.  
  
He cleared his throat. "I'm game if you are," he said with a smile pulling at the corner of his mouth.  
  
"Hey now," she returned jokingly.  
  
Harm walked over to the couch with the Bengay™ in hand, "Now how do you want me to do this, sit by your side or lean over top of you?" he asked honestly.  
  
"Whichever why you feel would work best," she answered him. Mac knew that no matter what Harm wouldn't hurt her.  
  
"Well I don't want to make you uncomfortable, but the best way to do this would be for me to, ah, um," he trailed off.  
  
"For you to ah, um, what Harm?" she teased.  
  
"For me to straddle your six. It would give me the best angle," he grimaced at his choice of words and saw Mac shaking in laughter beneath him.  
  
"You find this funny Marine?" he asked enjoying the fact that she was releasing some of that tension.  
  
"No, well yes, that just sounded like a line from a really bad porno or something," she said laughing again.  
  
They were both laughing now.  
  
"Alright Marine, now try to relax," said Harm as he opened up the bottle of pain relieving cream.  
  
The moment that he put his hands to her skin Mac felt a tingling, reserved only for Harm. He had an effect on her. His touch sent shivers throughout her entire body. She got goose-bumps.  
  
Harm saw the reaction he was creating and smiled to himself. At least I'm not the only one affected by this.  
  
Too soon after it started, it ended. Harm had rubbed the cream in the best he could and found that he now had no excuse to continue touching her. "How are you feeling? I didn't hurt you did I, I didn't press too hard?" he asked, his voice filled with concern.  
  
"No Harm, you didn't hurt me, that felt wonderful. Thank you," she said sincerely.  
  
"Well I'm going to run into your bathroom, put this stuff away, and wash up. You get dressed," he said kneeling down on the floor next to her. He tucked a piece of long hair behind her ear and ran a hand once more, slowly, down her back. She watched his eyes follow the contours of her back and heard him murmur, "God, you are so beautiful." She smiled at this and pulled his head down to kiss his forehead. She looked into his eyes and once more said, "Thank you."

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**A/N:** So what do you think? Good, Bad, Ugly. Please R & R. Chapter 3?? 


	3. Please

**Title:** Please  
  
**Author:** socgrl  
  
**Rating**: PG  
  
**Spoilers:** Everything, especially "Hail and Farewell"  
  
**Disclaimer:** You know who owns them, and it certainly isn't me

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Last time on Alright:  
  
"Well I'm going to run into your bathroom, put this stuff away, and wash up. You get dressed," he said kneeling down on the floor next to her. He tucked a piece of long hair behind her ear and ran a hand once more, slowly, down her back. She watched his eyes follow the contours of her back and heard him murmur, "God, you are so beautiful." She smiled at this and pulled his head down to kiss his forehead. She looked into his eyes and once more said, "Thank you."

* * *

By the time Harm had returned from the bathroom Mac had moved to her arm chair and was drinking her tea.  
  
"The couch not comfortable?" Harm asked.  
  
"Nah, its fine. The chair just provides better support," she said shrugging and took another sip.  
  
Harm took up a seat on the couch and began to take sips from the other mug.  
  
He took a deep breath, "Sarah," the use of her first name caught her attention. "I need to tell you something, but I don't want you to take it the wrong way."  
  
Mac took a deep breath of her own and nodded for him to continue.  
  
"I meant what I said about not leaving you. I will be here with you every stop of the way," he looked up to gauge her reaction. He noted a small smile and a nod for him to continue.  
  
"I also know that you have a million emotions running through your brain right now, and the last thing you need is even more added to that. But I can't look into your beautiful eyes one more moment without you knowing the truth. Sarah, I love you. I've loved you since, well I knew for sure that afternoon in the Admiral's office, the day after your father's funeral. When I looked at you I saw you for the beautiful woman you are and not just the friend that would never leave my side. I looked into your eyes and knew you held me captive. I knew from that moment on that I wanted to spend the rest of my life swimming in those eyes," he said, his voice cracking.  
  
"Oh Harm," Mac replied. "Why now, why after all this time," she pleaded with him.  
  
"Sarah, all I've ever wanted was for you to be happy. What you say goes. If you say you're happy, then I'm happy for you. If you say never," he stopped, looking down at the floor, "then never it is. But I can't let there be a never Mac. I need to fight now, because I will die alone if I don't spend eternity with you. There is no one else; there can be no one else."  
  
"Harm I love you too," she said with a smile gracing her face. She took a deep breath, "but we have to take this slow. I'm in no condition physically or mentally to jump into a new relationship. And this whole Clay thing needs to settle down a bit first," she said looking to him for understanding.  
  
"I told you I'm not going anywhere. So when you're ready, I'll be right by your side," he said reassuring her once again.  
  
"Harm," Mac asked, uncertainty ringing in her voice. "How do you feel about all of this, how would you feel if I was never able to have a baby of 'our' own?" she asked emphasizing 'our'.  
  
Getting up from his seat on the couch, Harm knelt down in front of Mac, grasping her hands in his.  
  
"Mac, Sarah, to be honest with you I'm scared to death. When have you ever known me to admit that I was scared about anything? The thought of not being able to see you everyday, to hear your laugh, to see your smile everyday makes me feel sick to my stomach. I do not want to do anything that will endanger your health, even if that means not conceiving 'our' own child. There are other methods available, thousands of kids looking for loving parents."  
  
Unconsciously, Harm released one of his hands from Mac's grasp and traced her stomach where a baby would reside. "Mac, you will make a great mother. You have the biggest and warmest heart of anybody I know. You would make any child very happy and proud," he said looking into her eyes. Her hand was now covering his circling her stomach. "But remember, nothing is for certain yet. We can always try and if not we will resort to other measures. We will just take it one step at a time."  
  
Mac nodded in agreement. She tried to hide the yawn that was building, but Harm caught her.  
  
"Ok beautiful, lets get you tucked into bed, and then I'm going to head home, k?" he said.  
  
He rose up off the floor and pulled her along with him. "You, bed, me, kitchen," he said like a Neanderthal.  
  
Mac just laughed at him, "ug, ug, don't forget to grab your club caveman."  
  
He smiled that famous Rabb smile and ushered her down the hallway.  
  
By the time Mac was crawling into bed, Harm had cleaned up the living room and started the dishwasher.  
  
"Alright Marine, you all set? Need anything?" he asked pulling the comforter up from the foot of the bed.  
  
"I think I'm good. But would you mind staying until I fall asleep?" she asked timidly.  
  
"Sure thing."  
  
Without another word Mac turned off the light, climbed into bed and lie on her back and Harm crawled in beside her. She grabbed his hand and rested it on her abdomen. Sitting up slightly he bent over and placed a kiss on her bare stomach. Laying back down he kissed her forehead and closed his eyes.  
  
Intertwining their fingers together Harm said a silent prayer.  
  
'Please God, lets us be strong enough to get through this in one piece.'

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A/N: Let me know what you think. Please R&R. For the moment this is the end...I'm swamped with work...but I have a feeling that it will continue once I get more inspiration. Thank you for all the wonderful reviews. You guys rock!!!!!!! 


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